Solo leaked script - Act III

Page 53

ACT 3

Scene XXXII: MILLENIUM FALCON, deep space - Deep space time

Shot of the MILLENIUM FALCON cockpit with HAN in the pilot’s seat; he has visibly aged, and so has the Falcon. Gone are the pristine white interiors and glamorous accessories. Just behind the door, we see the interior rooms packed with crates full of junk, some of them spilling out the contents - mainly illegal drugs. HAN is unshaven, looking tired and dazed. The only half-decent thing is the wide-brimmed fedora hat on his head, which was probably won in a recent gambling match.

HAN SOLO
C2M8, give me the status on the contents of the Mustafar spice cargo.
I’m coming down from it, man... I need me some of... the good stuff.

C2M8
Your worshipfulness! I must alert that JABBA has been expecting you for three weeks, and he seemed preoccupied on the last contact. The odds of not getting a reprimand are -

HAN SOLO
Shut it, robot! Or I’ll kick... you... in the -

HAN falls from the seat and passes out on the floor. C2M8 hurriedly issues a voice command for the ship to travel at light speed to CAPUTZA. Cut into the Falcon landing in the usual hangar. We see imperial troops swarming the main streets of CAPUTZA. As HAN wakes up and stumbles out, GREEDO reaches the hangar with a grin on his face.

GREEDO
Oonta goota, SOLO?

HAN SOLO
I’m not in the mood for your chauvinistic bulshit, GREEDO. If you want to talk to me, speak Corellian. Or better yet, just get out of my way, I know how to get to JABBA’s.

GREEDO
He’s not happy at all, SOLO. The imperials found *some*
spice on the containers headed to Coruscant.

HAN SOLO
And how did they find that out, Greedo? You don’t fool me!
You dirty RAT! Get out of my way.

HAN storms off, violently throwing GREEDO to the ground. As he leaves the hangar, he sees the spaceport full of imperials, checking JABBAS’s trucks one by one. He pulls his fedora down and quickly leaves.


Scene XXXIII: Jabba’s crib, CAPUTZA - Afternoon

HAN is greeted by a pale Twi’lek who has been serving as JABBA’s butler for the last few years. He tries to block his entrance but HAN simply walks inside, leaving the staffer no option but to follow him. He’s getting increasingly annoyed by all the intermediaries. After a few dozen steps, and three or four rooms and corridors later, he gets into the main office where he sees JABBA at a desk, nervously looking through papers.

JABBA TIURE (translated by BIB FORTUNA, the butler)
HAN! Finally you are here. We are in deep trouble. The imperials know about our... “goods”. You know, the good “goods”. The goodie goodies goti-di-godies “good” goodies -

HAN starts talking very quickly but stopping mid-sentence, looking around in paranoia.

HAN SOLO
I get the picture, JABBA. That dirty snitch... gave us away! He’s been trying to get his comeuppance... the jealous asshole... They couldn’t have known otherwise... we took every precaution... we bribed the right people, we -

He abruptly stops talking and seems exhausted.

JABBA TIURE
HAN, what has gotten into you? Calm down, my boy.
HANNY, have you been using the go-gotigi-good-goodies-goods on your own again?

HAN SOLO
Stop acting... like you were my father.
I’ve got everything under control... alright?

JABBA TIURE
HANNY... Why did I pay that VIP rehab program for?

HAN SOLO
Listen JABBA... just listen to me! We need to sort this out... We’ll have to relocate the operation... Don’t you own a place in... Tatooine? It’s in the middle of nowhere... it’s the perfect place for us now.

JABBA TIURE
Tatooine is bad news! I left it after the Great Podrace Tragedy of 3245 LY. Two brave podi-racers died in that year’s Boonta Eve Classic, which was won by a slave fatherless boy! Just like you, my HANNY! That’s why I decided to contribute to orphan’s charities, and left the darn planet after failing to get more security measures into legislation. I can’t go back there. Plus, all my family is here HANNY, all my dear friends -

HAN SOLO
We don’t have time for this sentimental crap!

HAN is yelling, wasting most of the energy he has left.

HAN SOLO
GREEDO has the Imperials on our tail... we have to move. That sand planet is the right place... The Empire has no power there... let’s go ALREADY.

HAN turns his back on a tearful JABBA and walks out. JABBA vents out some sorrowful words, which the dumb Twi’lek stupidly continues to translate to no audience whatsoever.

JABBA TIURE
Oh, ODDS-oddies... I’m doing my bests,
but the boy seems likes a lost hopies.

(end of excerpt)

Page 62

Scene XXXVI: MILLENIUM FALCON, deep space - Deep space time

HAN is stumbling through the MILLENIUM FALCON. Unlike the last few shipments, which were quite modest, the FALCON seems fuller than ever. HAN is clearly searching for something, going from crate to crate. He finally finds one with a golden seal on top: “GRADE AAA”. He rips the seal apart to open the crate.

C2M8
Master HAN, isn’t that part of our delivery?

HAN SOLO
Shut up, I need some of this if we’re going to delude the damn imperial surveillance ships. Plus, someone has to test the gooti-gooti-good-goodies...

HAN grabs a bag of high-quality glitterstim spice, the most expensive in the galaxy. Without hesitation he starts getting everything ready. The screen fades to black.

Fade-in: close-up shot of HAN facing up, gasping with his eyes wide-open. After a few seconds spent collecting his breath he gets C2M8 head, hastens to the cockpit and sits on the pilot’s chair. He seems determined. He lets out a loud scream of pleasure that startles C2M8, who rolls down to the floor.

HAN SOLO
WOOOOOOO! LET’S GO! Give me the coordinates of the exit point.

HAN starts talking very quickly, almost in a trance.

HAN SOLO
Alright, so Kessel is on our back, the exit is in front of us, we got some imperials here, we got some imperials there, we got the spice with us, Jabba is waiting on Tatooine, Kessel is on our back and Kessel is in front of us. If we go around the imperials and head back through JABBA maybe Kessel won’t see us… Give me some coordinates, droid! Let’s see... if we use the spice to get the JABBA from the imperials to the FALCON, maybe we can cut down a couple of parsecs, or maybe we get the parsecs on a milkshake on Tatooine... maybe...

These paradoxes were making C2M8’s processor heat up. The intermittent light flashes in his eyes indicated that he was making computationally heavy operations. He starts screeching and beeping very loudly, almost as weirdly as HAN, as if some of the spice had gotten into his circuits.

C2M8
Worshipfulness master input= Kessel & 010100010100 & spice parsecs > parsecs exit printf %.f2 1/8889 return 001010001010 JABBA spice spice++ Kessel^2 0101010010 100101010101000101 F@LCON || destination while exit do destination=spice product?

HAN
010101010\n.

The two apparently insane occupants of the FALCON are screaming utter nonsense at each other and at the freighter. HAN grabs his joystick and maneuvers it in ten different directions at once; at the same time we see C2M8 extending an appendage from the bottom of his exposed neck and attaching it to a port on the FALCON. A control panel right beside him shows the constant flux of contradictory orders he’s giving the spaceship every two milliseconds. The scene continues for a few moments, the focus changing from HAN to C2M8 and back to HAN as their constant yelling becomes increasingly incomprehensible. Suddenly, smoke starts coming out of C2M8’s head and, after a couple of seconds, he explodes as the FALCON comes to a full stop. HAN is projected against the main windowshield and passes out.

HAN SOLO wakes up on the floor of the cockpit. He is dizzy but manages to slowly climb up to the chair. He looks to the floor on his right side where he sees C2M8’s remains spread out. He seems sorrowful but still too confused to fully grasp what transpired there. He gazes over his shoulder into the interior on the FALCON and remembers the spice, the job. He turns around again and rests his hands on the control panel, still trying to remember what happened before he passed out. His eyes lower into the FALCON’s meter and suddenly he freezes. He seems transfixed. He blinks several times and double-checks the numbers. He can’t believe it: he just made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs.

(end of excerpt)

Page 68

Scene XXXVIII: Jabba’s Crib, TATOOINE – Evening

JABBA’s place is very different since last time. There are all kinds of weird aliens surrounding him, including exotic dancers and a groovy band. HAN hands him some paperwork.

JABBA TIURE (translated by BIB FORTUNA, looking more pink)
Oh, oh, oh! HANNY boy!
You always deliver, eh eh.

HAN SOLO
Easy job as always, JABBA. I see you upgraded the joint...

JABBA TIURE
Eh, eh, eh! You like what you see?

HAN SOLO
Doesn’t really seem like you. How’s the kid project going?
Many orphans for you to play benefactor around here?

JABBA TIURE
I have other projects now, my friend.
Have I shown you my new pet, the RANCOR?

HAN SOLO
I haven’t had the pleasure...

JABBA TIURE
Stick around for a bit HAN, you are a man of
pleasures, and there’s much I can show you, eh, eh, eh!

JABBA orders one of the alien girls to start dancing. She’s dressed in a slave costume. HAN looks disgusted.

HAN SOLO
Ok JABBA, hand me the money. I need to get going,
I’ve got another appointment on Mos Eisley.

JABBA TIURE
Oh, one of your low-life smuggler friends?
I thought you had stopped wasting your time with them.

HAN SOLO
Easy money is good money.

JABBA TIURE
Just don’t get caught, eh, eh, eh!

As HAN is leaving we hear JABBA laughing hysterically. He looks behind and notices that the dancing girl is no longer there and a trapdoor is open on the floor. As he turns his head and continues walking, a loud grunt echoes out of the caves.

(end of excerpt)

Page 74

Scene XL: Cantina, TATOOINE - Evening

HAN SOLO gets inside the Mos Eisley cantina and heads directly to a table in the back. Sitting there is BOBA FETT, his old acquaintance and sometimes rival.

HAN SOLO (under his breath, as he sits)
I have a bad feeling about this.

BOBA FETT
SOLO, there’s a job. The Empire wants two wookies.
I give you the info, you get them. 50-50.

HAN SOLO
Let me get this straight, BOBBY: you sit here drinking banthas milk while I head who knows where to get mangled by some wild fury beasts, try to get the payment before next year from the imperial bureaucrats and then come back here to give you HALF of the bounty? Did I get it right? Be serious FETT, 80-20.

BOBA FETT
70-30, SOLO. The intel is on your ship.
Scene XLI: Jungle, KASHYYYK - Afternoon

Zoom into HAN SOLO as he goes deeper into the jungle. He has his blaster ready but his hand is shaking, his forehead is sweaty, his eyes are wild - he has taken his usual “precautions”. He starts looking for his targets, but can’t concentrate; there are too many sounds, distractions all around. His steps are heavy but he presses on.

(end of excerpt)

Page 76


Scene XLII: Jungle, KASHYYYK - Evening

The lady was right, there were two wookies hidden inside the cave! One of them was coming out, apparently to get water from the river. He points his blaster at the wookie. He has the wookie in his aim. The other one comes out of the cave and calls the first. HAN understands their grunts.

HAN SOLO
... “father”... - they’re father and son!

The older wookie spots HAN. The two start running back inside the cave when a blaster shot hits the father on his back.

YOUNGER WOOKIE
RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWR!!!!

STORMTROOPER
Don’t let the other one escape!

HAN turns around and sees BOBA accompanied by two stormtroopers.

BOBA FETT
You’ll get your 30% for finding them.

The stormtroopers head for the cave.

HAN SOLO
That wasn’t our deal...
Why did you bring them?

BOBA FETT
Just business, quicker payment.

After a few moments and some commotion, HAN sees the two stormtroopers carrying the younger wookie, who must have been stunned. As they drag the wookie past him, HAN and the creature exchange a look. HAN quickly makes up his mind. He tries hard to compose himself.

HAN SOLO
I can take him. I’ll deliver him to your captain for 40%.

STORMTROOPER #1
We don’t take orders from you.

HAN SOLO
The captain trusts me pal, we are long time collaborators.
Why don’t you give me your ID number?
I will tell him about this.

STORMTROOPER #2
Step aside, punk.

HAN SOLO readies his blaster and points at the stormtroopers.

HAN SOLO
Easy now. Drop those blasters and uncuff the wookie.

Before they can follow his orders, BOBA returns, pointing his blaster at HAN.

BOBA FETT
Enough, SOLO. You’re going with the wookie.

HAN SOLO
You’re double crossing me FETT?
Get away or I’ll shoot you.
Don’t try me.
The two stare intensely at each other, but HAN is too agitated and loses his nerves, trying to change targets. His reflexes are not as responsive and BOBA shoots his blaster off his hand. The two stormtroopers storm him and lay a storm down on him. As one of them handcuffs HAN, the other hands the full payment to BOBA FETT.

(end of excerpt)

Page 79

Scene XLIV: KASHYYYK, a dirty and barely lit underground cell - Multiple occasions

HAN and the wookie are sitting in the prison cell, beaten up and bloodied. They have been there for days. HAN is sweating from cold turkey; he’s a mess. The wookie stares at him. HAN tries to mutter something, barely perceptible.

HAN SOLO
... traitor... get you... what am I doing...
bad path... the odds of dying today... low...

Someone comes, striking a stick on the cage-like door and throws two plates of a disgusting substance on the floor, breaking them. The wookie grabs his plate and eats, slowly, as he is now used to it. HAN doesn’t even notice the food.

HAN SOLO
... no one... to help... never anyone... solo.

An undetermined amount of time passes and HAN looks sicker than ever, almost only bones and fully bearded. The wookie still doesn’t trust him after all this time. But he has to do something or HAN will die. The food comes again. The wookie eats the food as usual. But this time, after some signs of doubt, he tries to give some soup to HAN. When he gives the first spoon, HAN drinks it but coughs it at the wookie’s face immediately.

THE WOOKIE
RAAAAAAAAWRFDPFDPFDPWWWCABRAOWWR!

He lets the soup fall into the ground and pushes HAN away. After some more time the wookie comes back to his senses and slowly gives HAN a piece of bread.

A few more days have passed, HAN still looks a mess but seems more attentive and less sick. The wookie is feeding HAN again, who grunts, with his mouth full.

HAN SOLO
This is awful...

THE WOOKIE
Rawr!

HAN SOLO
I can’t understand you, wookie. I just know one or two words.
Maybe you don’t understand me either... but ... thank you.

The wookie looks at him and, after a few moments, smiles. HAN frowns at his smile, bewildered. He opens his mouth to say something, stops to smile back and then says.

HAN SOLO
You can teach me wookienese sometime, maybe.


Scene XLV: KASHYYYK, the same prison cell – Morning

A few more days have passed, HAN is now eating by himself, with his hand still shaking. CHEWBACCA watches attentively.

HAN SOLO
I have to be honest about something with you pal *coughs*
I came here to get some wookies...

HAN SOLO waits for a reaction, but nothing comes.

HAN SOLO
You already figured that out, an? I was deep in some... trouble. Personal. And I needed the money. And, truth be told, I was too out of it to really know what I was signing up for. But then I got here and I saw you guys and... was he... was he your father?

CHEWBACCA
Gu gé!

A single tears starts dropping from CHEWIE’s eye, but gets lost in the fur.

HAN SOLO
Yeah... And so, I don’t know, even with all the spice, something clicked inside me... I couldn’t move. And then the imperials came and I HAD to move... but couldn’t... Couldn’t help you. Because of this damned spice! Sorry pal, I don’t know why I’m telling you all this, believe me, it’s not my type. I guess prison opens you up, right?

CHEWBACCA
Rw.

HAN SOLO
Anyway, when we get out of here... and we will... I’m going to stop, I’m going to kick this habit! Until then you’ll just have to deal with my withdrawal a while lon - *vomit*

(end of excerpt)

Page 83


Scene XLVII: KASHYYYK, the cell - Morning

HAN SOLO and CHEWBACCA have been behind bars for weeks, maybe months, when something unexpected happens.

PRISON GUARD #1
You have a visitor, SOLO.

The door to the corridor leading to the cell opens and a familiar face shows up: LANDO CALRISSIAN. Looking fine, sexy and beast.

LANDO CALRISSIAN
HAN... I only just knew of this.
I came as soon as I could.

HAN SOLO
Who told you?

LANDO CALRISSIAN
My wife.

HAN SOLO
You have a wife?

LANDO CALRISSIAN
I married an ewok... politics.
It's a temporary arrangement.

HAN SOLO
You were always into the hairy ones.

THE WOOKIE
Raaaaaaaaaawr!

LANDO CALRISSIAN
Don’t get too excited, fuzzball.

HAN SOLO
Nice seeing you, CALRISSIAN.

LANDO CALRISSIAN
You know I can’t get you out of here.

HAN SOLO
I know a way, and it won’t get you into trouble.

With his fingers, HAN SOLO motions LANDO CALRISSIAN to come closer. He leans in and waits for HAN to proceed.

(end of excerpt)

Page 90

Scene LI: MILLENIUM FALCON, flying fast over KASHYYYK – Evening

HAN quickly turns the controls, avoiding crashing into some trees. CHEWBACCA, standing behind, is almost thrown to the floor. Imperial TIE Fighters follow closely.

HAN SOLO
Have you ever been in one of this? Can you man the guns while I try to fly us out of here?

CHEWBACCA
Rrrwwwk!
Several shots of the spaceships as HAN skillfully navigates the MILLENIUM FALCON through the treetops and two of the enemy fighters slam right into them. As they start gaining altitude, a final TIE ship is still in hot pursuit, but just as it seems to be getting too close, it gets blown to smithereens by CHEWBACCA. Split shot of HAN in the cockpit and CHEWBBACCA in the cannon room.

HAN SOLLA
Attaboy!

CHEWBACCA
Gah!

As the MILLENIUM FALCON leaves KASHYYYK’s atmosphere, the wookie returns to the cockpit. He bashes his head against some golden dice dangling from the ceiling and tries to get them down.

CHEWBACCA
Gah gah!

HAN SOLO
Calm down pal, if it wasn’t for that lucky pair we wouldn’t be here.

CHEWBACCA lets out some more grunts into the air and then takes his seat as co-pilot of the FALCON, for the first time! HAN grins in his direction.

HAN SOLO
This is where the fun begins!

CUE MUSIC!

THE END